I Am Become Wenz: The Pregnancy Comedy Non-Issue

So, pregnancy comedies are the new thing. They're cool, they're hip. Fuck, professional blowhard Dave Eggers even wrote one with his wife called "Away We Go." I saw it last night. Considering his involvement, it wasn't that bad. Certainly better than "Juno," but it also was about 30-somethings instead of a teen girl with bullshit slang.

But when "Juno" came out, the Internet was alight, much as it was with "Knocked Up." What's that? Oh, it's anti-choice! Damn you Judd Apatow.

Will the same get lobbed at "Away We Go," thus having NPR poster boy Eggers decried and sent into the waiting arms of Operation: Rescue?

No.

Why?

Well ... there's not much of a comedy if they go through with the abortion. Here's how it would have gone if they got the abortion:

"Well fuck, fuck, fuck, you're pregnant. We need to get this taken care of because I'm broke. I'll sell some pot to get abortion money." "Great! That sounds awesome!"

"Here we are, at the clinic, about to make one of the hardest choices of our lives." "I just farted. Sorry, hangover burrito."

"Here comes the doctor, please hold my hand. I need a lot of emotional support." "Ha, I need a lot of BONER support after this. HIYO!" "Umm, this is not funny."

"Well, now that that's done, let's go to Burger King because I'm like, stoned out of my mind. Then I'll sell some of my DVDs so we can maybe get you counseling as this is not a decision anyone takes lightly."

Wow, that was significantly less funny than the actual movie, but probably funnier than "Juno." But, just for posterity sake:

"Hip pookie, I'm so good-wigged that you're going to drive me on your hip-Vespa to get this done in Mexico." "(Some mangled slang by a thirty-something trying to write a teenager. FAIL.)"

Perhaps in light of the George Tiller thing, this isn't funny. But I'm always the king of too soon - but with "Away We Go" possibly reigniting the Internet debate on the non-issue of pregnancy comedies, maybe it's a perspective to have. Abortion isn't exactly comedy fodder, or even dramedy fodder. It's not really funny. It's a difficult decision that nobody takes lightly.

I take that back. It was mildly funny once.